THE WILL TO HANG ON

          Life is such a wonderful gift and a great treasure yet once in a while it also becomes complicated. As we go along with it and develop different relationships, challenging situations also comes in. 

"As we advance in life it becomes more and more difficult, but in fighting the difficulties the inmost strength of the heart is developed." - Vincent Van Gogh ( http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/difficulties.html#irDlDGSkG8m7b6sI.99" 

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          As expressed by the famous Dutch impressionist painter Vincent Van Gogh above, the more that we spend time on this world, the more that our journey then also becomes complex. Everyday we encounter various experiences that will help or unhelp the development of our wholebeing. Even if at times, there could be instances that it is hard for us to cope with the situation. We may differ in terms of our reactions to difficult situations. 

          While some may be strong enough to face them, others may wilt and softened after encountering a problem. May we always remember that problems are part and parcel of life. What counts most for us is the will to survive. 

          The will to hang on plays a significant role in this arena of life. As human as we are, it could be possible that we will be upset with any big problem. On the other hand, if and foremost we know what really the problem is, then we might as well know soon or later how to deal with it.

          One of life's treasures is the presence of other significant people thus in the midst all trivialities and tough situations, we will humble ourselves and acknowledge their presence, ask for comfort as well as assistance.

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Pride makes it hard for us to do such gesture however, we need to lower our ego and recognize the special presence of others in our life. 

          May we never fail to constantly recognize that life is such a wonderful gift and let us then savor its every moment.

MY PERSONALITY TYPE: THE ENNEAGRAM

          Have you heard about the ENNEAGRAM? I find it so interesting since it deals about one's personality. With one's knowledge about his/her personality type, it therefore becomes a tool for him/ her to have a deeper understanding of oneself. On the other hand, this will serve as a method for understanding and welcoming the similarities as well as differences from one person to the other.

imagecourtesy:Lalaine Obrino Songalia

                                 
          ENNEGRAM is defined as "a geometric figure that delineates the nine basic personality of human nature and their complex interrelationships. That is exactly what I meant in my statement above that when this is familiarized, strengthening human relationships will become a reality. 

          To quote one blogger's reflection on ENNEAGRAM, " What I like most about it, it can show you your stress point and growth point. With ENNEAGRAM you will know the areas that you must improve on so you can be a fully integrated person. "- NOVA CRUZ (www.thefamilywoman.com)

          In my own enneagram type, I am a type ONE which is typically a reformer with a wing on TWO -The Helper. As a ONE, I am inclined to observe and practice an orderly sense in life. Moreover what is advantageous to me presently is that I am not imposing this sense of order with others even though at times, I am affected when things become disorder however I always put into consideration the characteristics and traits of others. 

          My second type (wing) is number TWO which is defined as the HELPER. However as a precaution, when left unhealthy, TWOs tend to practice self-denial thus allowing a person to merely deny his own needs and just recognizing other people's needs. Further, it is telling others the sense that "I don't need you; it is you  who needs me in your life". 

imagecourtesy:Lalaine Obrino Songalia

          In my case, I firmly believe that I can both be of help to others and that I also need them in my life. I would never survive just by myself alone. Through the Enneagram, being able to befriend oneself on a deeper level results to a more healthy dealings with others. 

WE ARE ALL IN A JOURNEY

                              Video courtesy of: Profe Teia    

               

          JOURNEY- a travel.....that's exactly what this life is. We are all in a journey. And on this journey, we are all companions. Whatever our destinations and routes are, at the end we could still say, "It's so great to finish the journey with you. Thank you for being there all throughout my journey."

          Moreover, this journey called LIFE starts with a single step. There could be times wherein we need to stop and take a rest for a while. At a certain point, we might fall down but let us all be sure that we are strong enough to stand up. At times, we might feel that we are alone.......yet we need to open our eyes and appreciate the presence of others who are just there somewhere guiding us along the way.  And certainly, we will feel great to realize that we are in a company in this journey. 

          At the end, it is not a  matter on how we start the journey, rather what counts most is how we end it. 

                                                       

LIFE'S HERE AND NOW REALITY

          Life as it is encompasses so many chapters. There were those which ended and there will be those that are still coming. Yet I personally believe that to be able to cherish life as it is, man should learn how to live life to its present reality- the here and now chapter of our life.

          I love to read quotations in life and oneof those which I treasure the most is this one from Buddha:" The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly."- Buddha

from:www.pixabay.com

           What I love in Buddha's words is its invitation for us all not to mourn whatever our past brought to us and not to worry as well to what will happen in our future. Rather we better invest our energy on living in the present for it is there that we can accomplish more in life. 

          Sad to say, there are several instances in a day that we lose our focus on the present moment rather we allow our minds to linger so much on the past and on the future. It is not bad after all to engage ourselves in those two realities yet if it then becomes too much that it greatly consumes our time in a day, then our here and now activities will surely be missed. 

          Just to emphasize my point, like when we are eating together with our family in a meal then instead of savoring the food and cherishing the presence of each one, our minds linger on the report that we will present the following day. Consequently, we deny ourselves the treasure of hearing the stories of those who are with us in the table aside from missing the delicious taste of the food. 

from:www.pixabay.com

          Aside from this situation, we can pinpoint several situations in a day wherein we stay out of focus on our here and now reality. We only need to accept what has been part of our history and we need to be open to what the  future will bring us. Being able to constantly be conscious to our present reality brings us into a deeper understanding of ourselves. We will then learn to embrace who we really are and at the same time, welcome both our positive and negative qualities. 

          After all, life is a constant journey and while we have others as our companions in this lifelong trip, the role of being the primary trekkers on this is left to ourselves.   

THE VALUE OF TIME (part 2)

          This is the second part of my post discussing about the importance of practicing and maintaining quality time with others especially with our loved ones. What is another striking element for me in what I quoted from my research, it is the part that says, "Usually time management is a necessity in any project development as it determines the project completion time and scope".

          Personally I consider each one's life journey as a personal endeavor and a project. We are the primary movers and doers in this personal project and whatever we attribute to this will make or break us.   The scope of this personal project (life journey) differs from one person to the other. What we therefore need individually is the self awareness that will enable us to plan and set directions to realize the project- our life. 

from:www.dreamstime.com

          At times, the road ahead us in life is seemingly daunting. Yet when we have a hold of ourselves including our dreams, the road ahead will become visible and reachable. If we assess our past days, we can easily recognize those passed times that were spent unproductively, void and wasted. We have 24 hours in a day yet we can always ask ourselves, " How then we divide those 24 hours in one day?", " How much do we spend out of this number (24) in a positive way?" "Where there instances that we failed to reach out to others in a span of a day?" These are but just some of the basic questions that we can ask ourselves everyday.

          The project completion of our life depends much on our personal investment. Thus, we are challenged each day to consciously align our actions to the objectives that we laid down as part of our way towards the realization of our dream- a life we can claim as a fulfilled one.

Are you determined in LIFE?

“Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough.” - Og Mandino

          For many occasions in life, our dreams have been stifled and tested by distractions, failures, and limitations. Yet our hold on our dreams pave the way for us to recover from them. Further, emerging triumphant over them showers us with some light that everything will be smooth sailing. Consequently, we then become inspired, renewed and determined by those challenging  moments in our life. 

from: www.dreamstime.com

          As my favorite inspirational author said, " Failure will never overtake me if my determination to suceed is strong enough"- Og Mandino. We have known many  life changing as well as success stories and they extend to us a reality that life is such a wonderful gift.  

          What is common among all these names? Guy Laliberte, John Paul DeJoria, Ursula Burns, Howard Schultz, LI Ka-shing, Francois Pinault,  Leonardo Del Vecchio, Kirk Kerkorian, Sheldon Aseldon among others? They are just some of the rags-to-riches stories so familiar in the business world. They all grew up in a similarly difficult and deprived situations yet on the later part of their lives, they succeed in turning their fate into a wealth and put their names on top of those successful people in the world.  

          Presently they join the list of the world's billionaires. Their stories just showed to us that in life,  no matter how deprived a person is yet if he is determined enough then sooner or later, he will also fulfill his dreams. Life's toughest challenges come to us in various forms and to be able to overcome them, we need to be determined and persistent. Indeed, we may falter and fall down a thousand times however what counts the most is our desire to rise up and to try again. 

          On the other hand, I would like to share another favorite quotation of mine, " There's comes a time when our personal calling is so deeply buried in our soul as to be invisible. But know that it's still there"- (Paulo Coelho).   This just shows to us that for those times wherein we seem to lose our goals and sense of direction, what will help us grab a sense of light is our awareness that deep inside of us lies our deepest ideals and aspirations.

from:www.dreamstime.com

          Life is like that of a spinning wheel as what others would claim. During times of self- evaluation, we can then identify those challenging moments however looking it on a positive point of view, it becomes noteworthy to mark those events in our life wherein we learn to embrace life's crosses- those difficult moments that tested our strength and determination in life. 

          Moreover at the end of the day, we may   recall back those trying moments and smile at the way we emerge triumphant over them. Let us all  move forward and turn every challenge that comes our way into an opportunity for growth and self fulfillment. Be determined in life.

ON FIDELITY: SOME QUOTES TO PONDER

          Fidelity- what really is it anyway? There have been numerous meanings related to fidelity. Some may sound realistic and others tend to be so idealistic. As time passes by, great minds have shared their experiences and ideas with regard to fidelity. Allow me to quote some of those thoughts and share my own sentiments on them.

"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose".

Helen Keller

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/fidelity.html#ySMhyu2Ihi51yJYW.99 

from: www.kozzi.com

          When we practice fidelity in a relationship, it becomes our virtue and a guide to sustain and improve the quality of our relationship until it reaches an unswerving stage. Whatever the nature of our relationship, it is our ability to keep up with our commitment that is valued. As shared above, real happiness means denying one's self satisfying tendency and rather, put in first place the other person's welfare. Although freedom is inherent in each individual, it negates the fact that one could just ignore the rights of the other especially the right to enjoy life. No matter how we present man as a self gratifying individual, he is still capable of reflecting real needs from mere wants.   

          Thus, staying faithful is in no way entertaining the idea of self gratification but rather, it considers on a deeper level the dignity and welfare of the other.  

from: www.kozzi.com

"That in affairs of very considerable importance men should deal with one another with satisfaction of mind, and mutual confidence, they must receive competent assurances concerning the integrity, fidelity, and constancy each of other".

Isaac Barrow 

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/fidelity.html#ySMhyu2Ihi51yJYW.99 

          The idea of self giving is what seems to be the perfect goal in any relationship. One should be constantly willing to make sacrifices for the beloved. To be altruistic, self satisfaction is relegated to be the next priority over the  welfare and the happiness of the other. Moreover mutual trust and support for each other must be met. Basically, this is a challenging one given man's complex nature which is both pleasant and unpleasant, rational and irrational. Again in order to meet a  relationship that is built on fidelity and trust, man needs to set aside, tamed and control his negative tendencies and invariably displays the desirable ones. 

"He who is faithful over a few things is a lord of cities. It does not matter whether you preach in Westminster Abbey or teach a ragged class, so you be faithful. The faithfulness is all."

      - George MacDonald 

           Faithfulness is everywhere and anywhere. Consequently, it goes beyond time and space. No  matter what state of life we are in, we are all invited and challenged to stay faithful to whatever commitment we are in. Being successful in maintaining fidelity within our relationships, we therefore detach ourselves from allowing any emotional distance between us and our partners. Finally the challenge  of maintaining the positive emotional entanglement in our relationship remains steadily present. 

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS

“Count your blessings. Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play, and you will finally be able to move forward the life that God intended for you with grace, strength, courage, and confidence.”- Og Mandino

by: MINDER, www.pixabay.com

          Augustine "Og" Mandino II, a famous inspirational author, was once an alcoholic in life. Consequently, his family including his wife Mirriam and their only child abandoned him. Such predicament was so intense that he reached a particular point in his journey that he was entertaining the idea of committing suicide. What changed his life was when he made himself busy by reading books of self help. He then eventually became a famous writer and  speaker. (Source: Wikipedia-the free encyclopedia)

          Indeed, we all have our own "Og Mandino story" in our life. A certain point wherein we seemed overwhelmed by those odds before us. Life is such a colorful journey that it is but natural for us to encounter its ups and downs making it more interesting to live by. Amidst of all life's colors, it is so noteworthy for us to also count our own blessings. 

          No matter how we assess life as a struggle, as a constant battle between right and wrong, a persistent tug of war between two opposing forces of this earth, still we all need to embrace all the goodness that we have received and experienced. These are the so-called blessings in our life. We need to count them....we need to constantly remind ourselves that after all, life is still one of the greatest gifts we have received from somebody up there. 

by: TPSDAVE, www.pixabay.com

          May we not merely focus on what others have, may we not be overcome by our limitations such as discontentment, disillusioned, remorse etc for they will just make us blind to see as well as appreciate our own giftedness. Let us count our blessings everyday and thank whoever give them to us. Being as such, we are also invited to share these blessings with others especially to those people who have lost their will to move forward. 

          Remember always the wonderful feeling when we realize that we then become instruments for others so that they will also see the light after each of every darkness that comes into their life. Just like the example of Og Mandino's life, may we constantly strive to get up and face the world after every fall. 

Every single second counts......

          Just to remind myself as well as others the value of life. First that it is a sacred gift from God and that it is ought to be shared with others. I have that responsibility---in fact-- a very serious one --to take care of my own self. I need not to create complicated ways to do it yet just by takin ggood care of this everyday makes it a very loving way of reciprocating this gift. 

          However, there are many factors in which I can begin with like taking care of my physical aspect and many more (emotional, spiritual, social etc.). There are so many do's and don'ts in my everyday living. Nevertheless, there could be times wherein I would fail in this daily undertaking. Yet at the end of the day, let this be a part of my daily perspective--to look back on all of my daily events and to express gratitude for all the good things I receive during the day and to feel sorry for all my wrongdoings. I may sound egoistic yet that is how the reality looks to me. 

          This is a primary duty to take care of my self growth. On the other hand, I also have that big responsibility to share this gift of life to others especially those who are deared to me. I need other people as well as others need me. That is the beauty of life---that I am able to realize that I am made unique from others so that I will come to know that there is a mutual need for each other. Others may not like me however I will focus on those who will assist me to grow deeper on myself. There is always be beauty in sharing myself with others. Hence, I will always strive for perpection as I am tasked to be and I will always extend this very self with others. There is no appropriate word also to describe when I feel the warmth of other people's care and love for me. 



                                                              

WHAT WILL I DO TODAY?

          Each new day brings lots of potentials to all of us. Different experiences, different people, varied memories. mixied emotions---these are but some of the chapters in our book called LIFE JOURNEY. 

          Everyday that I wake up, questions come out of my mind and what is prevailing to me everyday is the question, " What will I do today?" Upon stumbling this everyday question, it goes down to the very deep of me including my sense of priority in life. Personally this is an important question since I believe that each day brings numerous potentials to all of us. Thus it takes note to keep in touch of our daily priorities so that we can also answer positively the question I posed beforehand.

                               (Photo courtesy of BART MAMARIL)

FAMILY is always a PRIMARY SOURCE OF MOTIVATION

          My daily priorities may vary from time to time yet at top of them is always my family- my wife and my baby Kurt. They are always my daily consideration and that everything that I do daily is always for their own welfare. Knowing their special place in my heart and in my life, I consistently put in mind their own good in whatever I perform everyday. They endow me strength to be full of life in my work and in my other activities. 

          Families may seem distinct from one to the other yet at the onset, what binds them all together is the LOVE that   radiates from one member to the other. Ideally, LOVE seems so abstract yet when it boils down to any family, it then presents itself concretely through the loving gestures and accolades that family members exchange with one another. From the simple words "Good morning dad/mom" to any other act of affirmation such as "You did great in your math subject!", they already show much affection and love to every family member.

LOVE ABOUNDS IN THE FAMILY...

          Thus,  it is my attitude to show respect and love in very concrete ways to my most loved persons in life- to my wife Yanyan and to our baby Kurt. What will I do today" I know what exactly it is and it is to continue showering them with so much love and affection.

QUALITY TIME WITH FAMILY

          One of our considered treasures in life is our family. Thus it becomes a very essential part of our everyday living. Apart from our own life, it is the family that stands as one source of strength for all of us. We can learn bountiful things from our interactions inside our family. Certain values we can attribute to our family are  respect, love, affection, truthfulness, certitude, compassion, faith etc.

          On the other hand, it is very essential to ask ourselves: " Do we spend quality time with all the members of our family?", "Are we willing to commit ourselves to spend more time with our loved ones?", "Do we treat all  members of our family equally regardless of their rank, achievements, roles, etc?"

          These are but just some of the questions that we can constantly ask ourselves since being a family man or woman is a day to day commitment. It is such a wonderful feeling when we see all members of our family bonded together by love, affection, trust, acceptance and mutual support.

BE HAPPY INSIDE YOUR FAMILY

          Moreover, each family is a unique entity of any community. Whatever the uniqueness of each family yet there would always be a unified element among all other families. LOVE then becomes the most important component of every family and this love is radiated to all others. Being able to maintain a spontaneous and a positive relationship among all members of the family will result to a healthier environment. Members then will become more gentle, intelligent and likeable person to others.

          Hence I would like to reiterate that spending quality time with our family serves as a positive tool to produce productive members wherein someday, they will also grow as matured members of our society then finally they will also build their own   wonderful families.

HOW COULD WE BE HEROES to our CHILDREN?

          Trying to check from several sources about what a hero is, I discovered that from these series of meanings for HERO, what stand out as typical among them is that they are all geared towards kindness- towards something GOOD for somebody. Considering our children, they love to identify certain heroes in their life. When they're together with their peers, they enjoy playing the roles of their superheroes. Most common of these are Superman, Batman, Hercules, Darna, and many others. These are but just some of our known superheroes in print and in movies. 

"Heroes are people who transform compassion (a personal virtue) into heroic action (a civic virtue). In doing so, they put their best selves forward in service to humanity. A hero is as an individual or a network of people that take action on behalf of others in need, or in defense of integrity or a moral cause.

Heroic action is:

• Engaged in voluntarily;
• Conducted in service to one or more people or the community as a whole;
• Involving a risk to physical comfort, social stature, or quality of life; and
• Initiated without the expectation of material gain". (from Mike Dilbeck, Founder & President- RESPONSE ABILITY PROJECT, www.raproject.org)

Be a winner in life!

          What are the characteristics and qualities of a hero? Courage, honesty, zeal, compassion, have noble idea, trust, loyal etc -these are but just some of them. Going now to our primary role as parents to our children, are we able to portray these qualities and characteristics to them? Ideally for us to successfully and consistently perform them all is challenging and difficult. Moreover I personally believe that the most urgent call for us towards our children is our being a role  model to them.

 

          And among these qualities of a hero, it is LOVE that unites them together since when one is loving, courage, noble, and others will just naturally flow. Consequently we will be positive in resisting temptations. We can also  endure difficulties since we know from the start that our efforts are geared towards the fulfillment of a dream- that is to witness the positive growth of our children.  

          The present world is befell and threatened by numerous negative things like drugs, poverty, absence of fatherly/motherly image in the home, failure to study, hunger and many more. However in spite of them, we can still contribute to this world's positive growth and development by establishing a home that is full of love. Therefore it now becomes an urgent call for us as parents- to consistently serve as role models and as heroes to our children.

  

How Could We Be Relevant To Each Other?

         When we talk about relevance, it is then essential to know how do we relate to each other. I mean there could be so many labels about relationships -some of these could just be cliche, others would be the skin- deep type and many could be so significant that we mark them deep inside ourselves. Hence, any story about human interest like when a client feels excitement upon trying a new brand or a story about a customer being so overwhelmed by the success of a brand launching is worth note taking. These are examples of basic human experiences that are entertaining and interesting to you and me. Another way could be by telling how somebody overwhelms the sting of being deprived, underprivileged or non privileged to emerge as triumphant at the end.

          When we discuss on human interests, I understand that we normally don't want facts but rather we are moved by the impact of a person's story and life on you and me. How we are affected by certain persons and events in our life is more of an imprint to us. We, human beings,   are more focused on the the experiential level--what is it that we can see, touch and feel--this then plays a significant part in our hearts and minds.

          That exactly was my experience some years back when I personally befriended somebody who lost his left arm due to an accident. When someone sees him in such a condition and who doesn't know him personally can get him wrong and would possibly conclude that he is living a desperate life. One cannot help but feel pity and remorse for his situation. In a very progressive society like Chicago, one can but feel wondering how such a handicapped person could live and survive.

         Ironically, the contrast was what I felt for him ever since the first time that I found him selling newspapers on the  side of a road. Being interested on people, I readily smiled at him and I was glad when he smiled back at me. That was the beginning of our friendship. He had a family of his own----had two sons and a wife. During the next days, he  was consistently present in his place  even during summer with its scorching heat as well as on winter when temperature dropped at times at below zero degrees. A couple of times, I chatted with him either on my way to or from our sessions. One time, I had the chance to invite him for some food and there, I learned more details of him.

         What was so striking to me in all his sharing was that he disregarded the sting of the weather whether it's winter or summer. He joyfully and consistently performed his duties  in the name of his love and concern for his family. Yes it was true that he received some assistance from  the government  yet he told me that he went on working since he was so inspired by his two sons who at that time were doing well in all their studies. Looking back on that experience, I came up with one realization that one's deprivation is not a hindrance for him/her to reach his/her dreams if he/she instills in his/her  mind and heart that everything is done in the name of love. Finally anybody who has the same positive story of winning is very much welcomed to share his/her story here.